The guide often appear at the beginning of the trip, in the dome or just after. He is sometimes seen as a little bearded man with a triangular hat.
Hyperspace Lexicon description :
Presenting itself as a calm, gentle, benevolent teacher, this personality was responsible for teaching me many lessons which seemed to be improving my life. This was my primary source of contact with the beings, and the “voice” that I felt like I had consistent access to, even sometimes while awake (see my comments on having “conversations with myself” ). He was also responsible for “pulling” me into hyperspace and other altered states on a few occasions (and possibly more than I realize).
I Have Been Here Millions of Times.
I fell, poured, dripped into a wet, squishy, black tunnel. It felt like being pulled inside out and having an orgasm, and drowning…maybe like being born.
It sounded like squeezing a bunch of overripe fruit.
As I slid into the darkness I thought, “I am dying…this is death”… I hesitated and struggled, lifting my head up, but it felt like warm, heavy sand was pouring over me, wrapping around my legs, and pulling me deliriously down. My mind filled with joy and love. Every experience I have ever had flew through me in an ecstatic burst of gratitude…everything was an integral piece of everything else… I felt overwhelming contentment and peace…
I let go…
and was immediately reborn into light.
(click-click)
Time was static.
It clicked like clockworks that were stuck. The sound jolted through my body like measured tapping through thin ice, sending cracks in every direction aligning everything according to some divine geometry.
I looked around me.
My living room had become merely a suggestion of space, the once cluttered room was larger and empty, transformed into what appeared to be a small enclosed corridor in a temple. Columns replaced the door frames. The former vibrant orange, art and bookcase covered walls, were transformed into monastic panels of ivory marble. While pale and cool, it radiated warmth and life, pulsing and existing slightly outside of its boundaries.
I sat on a tall marble slab unique for the large round finial at the end of an armrest to my left, the only decorative element in an otherwise spartan room. I looked down at myself. My body was diaphanous, only my arms retained any true shape although they also appeared to be apparitions. I could see “energy” freely passing through the room, the air, and me, in sparkly transparent overlays of geometry that flowed like seaweed made of spiderwebs and pulsed like a heart. It seemed irresistibly drawn to me. I took a deep breath and tried to brace for the waves. My “body” pulled it in. I could see the hairs on my arm reaching out to it. I felt EVERYTHING. Not just what I was witnessing, but, EVERYTHING.
Everything that had ever happened.
I gasped…inundated.
I felt powerful.
“Am I god?” I thought, feeling suddenly self-conscious.
My “guardian” sat to my right looking up at me. Their golden figure was warm, masculine and gentle, alternating between a presence and a thought. Their face was a reflection of every face I have ever known, ebbing and flowing into one another, into me, into everything.
“Everything is god.” I thought.
”Yeah’, they laughed.
The room seemed to breathe. Appearing to be lit from within, by candlelight and gentle sparks of electricity, it cast little fractal shadows that swirled on its breath. I felt all of the “knowledge” of the universe flowing through me on those currents of air, but the air wasn’t really air at all. It was alive, crystalline and gold, fluid and solid, and multi-dimensional. I could feel it stickily pass through me in gentle waves and ripples like a ghost through a wall.
My guardian sat quietly patting my hand and agreeing with the thousands of conclusions and boggling realizations that raced through my mind in an instant. My mind was “agape”, awash with love, and appreciation, and the strongest feeling of what can only be described as relief. It was overwhelming but so familiar.
I then instantly became aware of a universal truth that made everything connected… made everything One Thing. I was only able to remember bits of it, but from what I was able to retain: While Physical existence is of course finite, Existence is infinite. In the infinite, your id, your ego is lost, your sense-of-self happily dissolves into what might be described as God, the manifestation of all of the knowledge and energy, of everything in the universe.
“I don’t exist.” I said bemusedly as I watched little bits of myself peel off like cotton candy and stich themselves into the web, connecting me more firmly to it, encasing me in it.
It felt like waking up from a deep sleep and coming home.
I was then flooded with awareness of past lives…all of the lives I have lived… all of the lives that ever were, in a swell of bittersweet. Struck dumb and drowning in All of Memory, I kept shaking my head in respectful awe at the absurd rabbit-hole of physical existence.
“There is no death”, I thought. You just get poured back into the fabric.
They smiled at me boyishly. “Yep”, but it wasn’t a voice, it came in the form of a thought and a feeling like warm honey poured over my head and down the back of my neck.
I then began to “feel” all of the other times I had experienced this exact moment of realization. I was immediately aware of the infinite number of times we had this precise exchange. They washed over me and became projected over the top of eachother across my field of vision, a frenetic echoing of all of the questions I had ever asked a million times before, and my guardian’s quiet patient encouragement and amused grin.
They held my hand. It felt comfortable and safe.
“I’ve been here millions and millions of times?”
They laughed and responded, “Yes, you have”.
I curled into a ball against their warmth, feeling them dissolve into me.
I felt the room start to shift back. “I’m not going to remember any of this”, I thought. I closed my eyes tightly and struggled to hold on to as much as I could but I felt it being pulled away from me, through me, like sand withdrawing around my body on the ebb of a wave.
As I succumbed to the pleasant inevitableness, I felt their energy wrap around me in a protective embrace. I felt them stare at me in amusement, smile, and repeat quietly, “millions and millions of times… millions and millions of times…millions and millions of times millions and millions of times millionsandmillionsoftimes.”
Hello,
I very much enjoyed reading your encounter! It doesn’t sound altogether too terrifying, that’s great.
There are many striking similarities within your writing that we may share.. which is new to me and a bit encouraging. I have yet to meet anyone or hear/read any quite like my own. throughout a lot of studying. Great job describing the impossible.
The static time, feeling everything, infinite knowledge and power + the millions and millions of times just names a few of the similarities. I have this through and through on many occasions. I have had the breakthrough experience so many times that I believe I may have discovered stages of what seems to be the “the greater experience or higher understanding?? I’m not exactly certain however, nonetheless I did arrive at or to something…. that is a longer story that took place over three breakthroughs consecutively but spaced out. (At one point I was initiating a breakthrough experience every hour on the hour for at least six months) [although of course I did sleep for a few hours a night – lol]. So… the “three experiences consecutively” statement is rather significant, at least to me. I had almost given up searching for answers as to why I was that type of experience and no one else was. Absolutely no one I knew, heard of or read about was identifying with anything I recounted… At any rate – I hope I don’t sound crazy…!! What do you make of it all?? your experience? I would love to hear more! that column to the right over there … all those topics… I have yet to actually see any entities. except one maybe two – -but it was more like a physical experience I was having with someone at the time. The only other was similar to what you described as a sensing of something or someone but not just one there are many. they seem to be a gathering of some sort. I felt that they were my friends it was a relief when finally, they appeared. It was like a surprise, suddenly I became reunited with the many. It was as if I had known them for “millions of years.” no kidding. They wanted me to do something – pull something from the earth. Something from inside the earth. I doubted myself though – not necessarily that I couldn’t do it but, Suddenly I had a question; who are these people? Because to me they all appeared human in form, but definitely not in nature. I have never really belonged to anything or followed any religion or belief system, so I felt concerned about what they may be asking me to do and whether or not is what is best for mankind. Were they are asking me to be a part of something they wanted? Some particular outcome perhaps? I couldn’t be sure… but I felt quite literally like they had been awaiting my arrival. and indeed, I had arrived. Afterwards, and after a long break of a couple days or so, the experiences that followed were indescribable! it all revolved around me becoming something I refused to be and do something I refused to do. (I know – it sounds crazy) in the end I chose to walk my own way, having never made peace with any of it. until a couple of months ago in those three consecutive experiences.. Anyways – sorry! long rambling read I know! I truly liked your description though!
I’ve been searching for someone to talk about ‘The Guide” since my first trip, and this is the only things that’s resonated. It happened during the first time I sat down with the substance. My first two doses were small, each time working up. On the 3rd dose I saw a man with a triangular hat pulled down over his eyes, and he was moving his hand in a way to indicate pushing me away. When I got out of the trip my sitter suggested instead of pushing me away, they were welcoming me in. With this new insight I set out to go as far as I could. And boy did I. I broke through, met Ganesha and was told what I needed to know to make it through the day. As this started to fade, another scene appeared. The man with the hat was back, only this time, we were around a campfire/alter. The guide, then proceeded to show various symbols from all religions and cultures and left me with a simple message “It’s all true”.